Piranha Non Playing Strategy Pays Dividends

  • December 14, 2014

Always one to embrace novel and ground breaking strategies Captain Camp again decided not to play again this week – and it paid off in several ways:

  1. The Piranhas stay top of the league with 2 games in hand
  2. The Bambi Twins didn’t hurt their little limbs
  3. Thumper Whinmill didn’t crash a ball into anyone
  4. Gary White didn’t flash his caber or let loose his haggis
  5. Kit Lamb gave his Berserker outfit a rest
  6. The umpires missed out on yet another week of embellishing their knowledge of the hockey rules with useful interpretations from Captain Camp
  7. Ed Hornby had another week to get back from Antartica
  8. We didn’t have to eat 40 pies and a vat of beans after the game again – consequently the Thames sewage works breathed another sigh of relief….
  9. The youngsters – Charlie Camp, Zach McCoomb, Thomas Allman, Sam Bracke, Harry Simons, and Finley McEvoy avoided yet another week of old men pushing them over and calling them “pesky kids”.
  10. That’s 2 weeks of the “Mr Pants” award that has to be awarded by default to Matt Allman.

So we continue not to play and we continue to top the league……next week apparently we may face the Maidenhead Monarchs……..
If not then The Piranhas wish you a Happy Christmas – “The Piranha Reports” will be released soon – a great present for any discerning child……….